• Bob Katter to guest edit the Woman’s Weekly • Major amounts of pork barrelling at the Big Banana to appease oakeshott and Katter • Oakeshott in speedos for the female vote • Tony Abbott – will unleash the new Tony kinder gentler for the same length of time it takes him to boot up his wordstar 1000 computer • The destructive faceless men of the labour party will be busted as revealed as Nick Minchin and Kevin Andrews • Julia Gillard releases new slogan – Just Clinging On • New rail link announced between Rooty Hill RSL and Altona