Scandi noir gives me the blues

Scandi Noir’s star is rising quicker than you can say Skol. It’s the latest greatest TV genre and it seems that TV land cannot get enough of it

Further proof that Ikea is plotting a world takeover.

As usual, I’ve missed the bandwagon but done a little telly catch up and recently have seen Borgen, Wallender and something else where someone is viciously killed and a group of blondes in woolly jumpers sit in meetings trying to find the perpetrator, aka The Scandi Baddie.

The result is usually so unbelievable that you’re meant to believe it. 

Scandi Noir is bleak, depressing and no amount of svelte neo Vikings with cute little noses and perfect cheekbones changes a thing. These people have no sense of humour and why is it taking eight weeks to solve a crime? They are inefficient! NSW cops could have knocked some of these crimes off in three weeks and then gone to the pub. Bugger sitting in meetings wearing turtlenecks! 

Scandi Noir may sound like a new and lethal cocktail but after a block of Scandi Noir TV watching I’m ready to drink my own body weight in Finnish vodka.

I’d like to see Scandi Noir put back in its box – eine kleine relaxation for Scandinavians at the end of their 30 hour week. Skol to that.